Time is Running Out

37 weeks

3 weeks and one day to go until BabyG day. This period is known in medical-speak as "Anytime Now Folks". So from now on, every abdominal twinge, every backache becomes a "Oh God! is this it? Was that the start of a contraction?"

Despite having attended two very informative antenatal classes I have to admit that as first-time parents we remain pretty damn clueless as to what to expect. Husband nags me to get my hospital bag finished so we're not caught on the hop, and jumps on the phone tracking me down if I'm out longer than usual doing the shopping (simple explanation for my tardiness: I made the elementary mistake of going to Tesco's on a Saturday...or was it just Krispy Kreme counter was busy? Ahem).

We've plugged every conceivable hospital number into our phones, and I have every conceivable phone number for Husband plugged into my phone. I've just realised, though, that I just called him to talk about the water bill (yes, my life really is that exciting) only he was in a meeting so I left a message. He is likely to think this is "the call" and race to the phone in a panic. Oops. Perhaps I should lay off ringing him at work for a while....

Various things preoccupy me, like the fact that I like to indulge in nice warm baths to soothe my aching legs but what if my waters break in the bath and I don't notice? Oh, and while we're on the subject of my legs, my "cankles" have now become "knankles", i.e. I now have swelling from the knees down to podgy little toes. Mercifully, thanks to the size of my bump I am unable to see my legs most of the time.

Meanwhile, I'm obsessed with the position of the baby. It's supposed to be head down, with its spine to the left and limbs to the right. I spend an inordinate amount of time lying on my left-hand side to encourage BabyG to get in the right position. I poke and I prod trying to figure out how the baby is lying. I talk to BabyG to encourage him to do Mummy a favour and get in the right position. Husband and I have daily conversations based entirely on the subject of whether my bump is higher or lower than the day before (lower is a good sign that the baby is "engaged").

BabyG, meanwhile, adjusts his position approximately, ooh, ten times a day. Some days he lies lower, making us think that the head is engaged. Then before you know it he has has popped back up again. One morning he kicks on the left, by the afternoon he's kicking on the right.

I am not convinced that BabyG has any intention of coming out at all.